The referent refuses

by Marisa Siegel

The referent refuses to remain steady in frame of something more like, when we were stuck that time which falling –

And “try to keep perspective” on what might be a different kind of settling altogether. And “keep calm”. Keep outside the situation altogether.

Before it was distilled, before there was too much context, wasn’t it better? Wasn’t it easier? “It was never easier.” It wasn’t ever easier.

The middle of the night is one of the longer scenes. The settings aren’t complex but the range to be evoked is overwhelming.

I try to remind myself that I am just a vessel. Or, I am collecting experiences. Or, what a memory is and is not worth.